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The Denier – A family member that denies either the severity of drug and alcohol abuse problems within a family system, or denies they exist at all.
A PART OF THE FAMILY FIRST INTERVENTION FAMILY ROLES ADDICTION RESOURCE
Why Don’t Families Get Help For Addiction?
How Do I Get Help for My Addicted Loved One When Another Family Member Is In Denial? My Family Is In Denial About the Addiction Situation.
In family roles, you always have the person that is the denier. When family members that deny that there are a problems with drugs or the drinking, or affairs or whatever other behaviors are going on, they do so as a defense mechanism.
In their mind, they cannot deal with the situation and they shut down. They try and let everything deflect off of them in the form of denial, because — if you deny it exists, it can’t hurt you, right?
Denial is a defense mechanism. It justifies complex situations in our and makes it the situation digestible. The more severe and possibly traumatic the situation, the more likely and easier it gets for a person to deny what is right in front of them.
“Your loved one is an addict or an alcoholic, now is not the time to deny the fatal symptoms…”
“Addiction is a fatal illness and you cannot downplay the situation.”
Our Denial Deprives Others of Getting Help
Denial gets you nowhere. It just convinces you that you don’t have to do anything. When an individual is in denial, they are convinced that the situation will simply unfold for the better even if they don’t do anything. They believe the mountain will come to them. However, this simply does not happen in most cases. Remember that you have the addict in their role, and the family members around them all play their own part in why the addiction is continuing…
Mom is the Enabler giving money for rent… Dad is in denial and thinks the drinking and wild behavior is blown out of proportion… Sister is “The Hero” thinking her advice will eventually save the day… Everybody has their role because the addiction continues.
How Do You Convince a Family Member to do an Intervention?
The denial role, along with the hero role, is the role that most often spurs the question, “how do you convince a family member to do an intervention?” This is because of the frustrations family members feel when another member of the family flat out denies that substance abuse, addiction, drinking and severe issues are happening.
Even when evidence of drug and alcohol problems have been presented, this person still denies there is a problem. It may seem “crazy” that a person would continue to deny a problem even in the face of evidence to the contrary, but this is a trick of the brain. It’s defense mechanism that requires a mental health, family counselor or family interventionist to bypass.
The main “Target” or “patient” of an intervention is the addict himself/herself, but in order for the intervention, treatment, and subsequent readjustment to everyday sober life with family to happen, the whole family needs to be “treated.”
DON’T LET DENIAL FORCE A LOVED ONE INTO A DANGEROUS SITUATION!
All too often the one who loses the most from denial is the addict, who may die as a result of inactivity on their part and those who are closest to them.
Families need to be reminded of the seriousness of substance abuse and addiction problems. Forget the worst case scenario – which is that the alcoholic or addict could die — and instead focus on the negative repercussions today! How has your family’s lives been altered by the substance abuse and the waves of negativity that emanate outward from it?
Does This Situation Seem Familiar?
Family First Addiction Interventionist has been involved with hundreds of family cases, and while each family is unique, the family roles pop up over and over again. These similarities in the way families react to problems within their family systems have actually been the key to us being so successful in helping families turn their problems around. Because the scenarios follow patters, and are so similar, we can model and predict outcomes.
We know what a successful recovery from drug and alcohol addiction looks like, and we present options to families that can bring them on the path to recovery. We can help your family as well…